Also… THIS. IS. SEXUAL. ASSAULT.
Despite offering to split the bill for brunch, Jonathan insisted it was his treat.
I graciously accepted and insisted upon picking up the tab at the following establishment. Before I knew it Jonathan and I had spent the better part of the day doing a mini bar crawl around some of the lovely watering holes that Brooklyn had to offer and we were already discussing when we would see each other again in the near future. When it was apparent that I had reached the threshold of alcohol intake for the evening, I told Jonathan that it was about time I called it a night and head back to my apartment.
“So…does that mean I am coming with you?” He asked in a cheeky British accent.
Not being one to bring home a man I just met (I need to be wooed), “Good try, but not tonight,” I replied.
Jonathan clearly resented the fact that he did not receive an invitation to join me, and suddenly his demeanor shifted from a sweet, gentlemanly English boy to a sarcastic, entitled imbecile. I’m talking some Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde type shit.
A complete 180. Jonathan was visibly PISSED. OFF.
“Well then, I guess I’ll be going then,” he said indignantly as he flagged the bartender for the bill. “I don’t understand how you spend all day with someone and then just…whatever. Just whatever.” Confused, I explained (not that he was owed a fucking explanation) that I did have a great day, but I simply do not bring guys home with me who I just met.
We sat on our barstools facing each other, enveloped in awkward silence, and waited for the bill.
Then Jonathan reached over, put his hand down the draped V-neck of my blouse… And cupped his hand around my breast and gave it a quick, firm double squeeze. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?!?” I shouted. “You cannot just touch people like that. Are you out of your damn mind?”
“Oh chill out. It was just a quick squeeze” he said with a shit-eating smirk on his face.
“That is not OK. You can’t just grab women’s tits like that whenever you want. It’s really disturbing that you think something like that is acceptable,” I said, other patrons in the bar noticing the altercation. “Stop being so crazy. You need to calm down.” With that, Jonathan closed our tab and fled the bar.
As I was still sitting on my barstool in shock and waiting for my Uber to arrive Jonathan returned to the bar and once again told me that I was overreacting and how he didn’t want to end a wonderful day on such a negative note. “You just grabbed my fucking chest. Who the hell do you think you are?” I asked.
“Seriously? Can you please just stop making a big deal out of this? You’re being so fucking ridiculous. I obviously dodged a bullet.” With that I fled the establishment to be rescued by my Uber driver.
Shortly after I received a number of hostile texts informing me that I needed to pay him back for the afternoon. When I refused he told me it was probably because a person as dumb as me probably didn’t make much money.
OH! And the entire day was a complete waste of his time and money.
Louder for the boys in the back…
THIS. IS. SEXUAL. ASSAULT. YOU. PILE. OF. FUCKING. GARBAGE.