La Vie En Rose – Life in Pink.
A song by Edith Piaf, a French singer from the 1950s, has been one of my favorites growing up. It brings back memories of my childhood as my mother would frequently pick me up from school and play music in the car from all over the world, especially classic songs with meaning. She would always tell me, “Listen to the words,” and I would shrug and get annoyed. Later on, I grew appreciative of my mom sharing her love of music with me.
Anyway, life in pink.
I’ve always been an optimist. I really try to see the positive in every situation and in every person. I guess you could say I see life in pink.
Well in the last year, things have become more grey than pink. I recently opened up on my social media that I’ve been battling anxiety and depression, and have been getting help as well as taking medication to help.
I am pretty sure I’ve been suffering for more than a year, but never wanted to admit that I, Lynn Hazan, the happy go lucky person, am actually depressed. I was ignorant, always saying that the US is over-medicated and that people should just work out, meditate if they are feeling depressed, or maybe smoking a joint would help.
It’s true that the US has a prescription pill problem, more than in other countries. But look at the way we live, especially in the New York City area. The constant pressure, the grind, working long hours with no life balance can sincerely wreak havoc on one’s well being.
There is this glamorizing of the “Hustle,” that we must work all day, that we are #nevernotworking, that we need to always be “on” in order to be successful. We are all trying to live the “American Dream.” It’s like there is this competition of who works harder. This is on the expense of our well being.
In the last year, I found myself thinking about work every moment of the day, even during times I am supposed to enjoy myself. I was neglecting my health, my family, and my friends. At the expense of the “hustle,” the “grind.” Also this job comes with a lot of pressure. Not a day doesn’t go by without me seeing/reading something negative about me or my brand… a tweet, a comment, a Facebook message… This is for another post though.
So naturally, I fell into a deep depression. I would wake up every few hours in the middle of the night with anxiety, I would have breakdowns at the office over the most minute problems and work issues… I felt sometimes like it was the end of the world.
I realized that I needed to get help. I finally did. I went to therapy, went to a psychiatrist, and let it all out.
I started taking medication for my anxiety and depression, went to therapy to talk about my feelings, started acupuncture at Acuworx to force me to relax during workday hours, and rescued a puppy from Liberty Humane Society.
In the last few months, the fog has started to clear and I feel better and much happier. Every day I have to work on it and some days are definitely better than others, but I know now that it’s so important, that my mental health needs to come first and my life, my family, and my relationships need to come before work.
My father said to me once, who by the way is a serial entrepreneur and still “hustles” every day, “When you die, on your tombstone (in the jewish religion) what does it say? It doesn’t say how much money you made, or how successful you were. It says that you were a mother, a sister, a father, a son, a daughter. When you die, you are leaving your family and friends behind, not a job or a business. All that doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of life.”
For the last few months, I’ve been staying home more, spending a lot more time with my family and my new puppy, and trying not to let the negative things affect me. I am happy to say, I am seeing life in pink again.
La Vie En Rose.
Thank you for sharing your story chickpea! You’re truly an inspiration xoxo
Your comments are beautiful. Continued success.