The landscape of our world has changed dramatically since COVID19 has entered the scene. Government advises us to wear face masks and gloves, stay six feet away from one another, and STAY HOME. According to the CDC, social distancing is the number one way to stay safe but, for victims of domestic violence, it can be life endangering.
We know that domestic violence is a dynamic cycle of abuse that relies on an imbalance of power and control in a relationship. Abusers gain power by gradually isolating their victims from resources such as supportive friends, money, and physical distance from the abuse.
It takes an average of seven attempts before a victim leaves their abuser.
When a family makes the decision to leave a home where danger is imminent, they are oftentimes choosing to leave behind everything they have built for the well-being and safety of their children. We know that the average number of times it takes for a victim to escape her abuser is about seven times. The experience that these mothers have in their new “safe space” is crucial in supporting their journey to rebuild. When victims are faced with insurmountable financial challenges, it becomes even harder to not return to where they escaped.
While crime has gone down, domestic violence has increased worldwide and is being referred to as “intimate terrorism” (source). Rihanna has taken a public stand, using her celebrity status to highlight these increased risks and donated $2.1 million to domestic violence victims in coronavirus lockdowns in Los Angeles (source). Fundraisers are popping up for victims of domestic violence all around the country but what about our own neighbors here in Hudson County? We’re being considered a hot spot for the virus but there is something even more sinister looming over these times. With the health and safety directives of the World Health Organization, victims are forced to stay inside and children are exposed to the violence that they may have once been shielded from by school.
The Social Workers who continue to serve at-risk populations are some of the unsung heroes during these times. Many are working remotely, caring for their own children at home while serving victims of abuse and hearing stories of pervasive trauma. We’re hearing about how victims feel trapped, unable to escape their abuse even though they feel ready to leave. Public benefits applications are severely delayed, limiting the financial resource for families. Many have lost jobs and any financial means. Children are at home and witnessing the abuse that mothers were once able to shield them from through school and activities outside the home. They don’t have time away from the home where to call the police and domestic violence officers are not conducting home visits to check in on the wellbeing of victims identified on their high propensity list. This list includes women who have been strangled at the hand of their abuser, victims of stalking, victims with young children who have also experienced abuse, etc. Meanwhile, the stress of COVID19 increases the frequency of abuse.
Okay so, what can we do?
Just Human is a community project that I launched in January of this year in response to the need. We collect, store, and redistribute curated home goods donations to families impacted by domestic violence across Hudson County. It is our mission to create safe spaces that also nurture emotional safety, apartments that are beautiful and conducive to healing. I was blown away by the incredible amount of support I received from Jersey City and Hoboken folks. Every weekend was spent dragging my significant other and our baby around Hudson County, collecting beautiful donations. With the help of local volunteers, we transformed four apartments into beautiful homes for these families. Unfortunately, the whole operation halted once we started to see the devastation of COVID19 rise back in March. It just didn’t make sense to risk ourselves, our volunteers, our donors, or the families we serve.
Women Rising is a community-based organization that supports women in Hudson County, serving 11,480 individuals and providing 170 families with a safe space to live (source). They run a 24/7 hotline to offer counseling, shelter and supportive services. Their domestic violence shelter has 24 beds but, due to proximity restrictions, they are only able to fill 8 of those. It has become difficult for families to move out of the shelter and into their own apartments because landlords aren’t willing to show apartments right now. This creates a stall in the flow of families they are able to serve but they anticipate a surge in intakes once we get through the apex of COVID19 cases. The need for homes that offer stability and comfort will be all that much more valuable. And that is where Just Human is coming in. We have created a crowdfunding campaign via IFundWomen to raise funds for these efforts so that, as soon as it safe to congregate again, we can gather those volunteers and transform bare-bones apartments for these families. We believe that it is our moral imperative to think beyond the next few weeks of this crisis and prepare for ways to support victims especially as we see budget cuts slashing the funding for social services (source).
Visit Just Human at www.becauseitsjusthuman.org to learn more about our initiatives and www.womenrising.org to support one of our community’s most valuable resources for families impacted by domestic violence. And remember, we’re all in this together! Jersey Strong .
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